For you mom

You worked all day at your job balancing your responsibilities and tasks. You were harried, hurried, and maybe even harassed. At the end of a long day you came home, took your special needs child to therapy, your typical child to her piano lesson, checked on dinner in the crock pot, and put yet another endless load of laundry in the washing machine. After dinner you did the dishes, administered the baths, tried to figure out where you can cut expenses to get $85 for the doctors appointment on Friday, laid out tomorrow's clothes, read two bedtime stories, and wrestled with your non-verbal autistic child for three hours trying to get him to go to sleep.

Around 1am you cried softly into your pillow and wondered how in the world you can go on any longer. In four hours you will get up and do it all over again.

Day after day.Week after week. There is never enough time to get it all done, and there is always too much month at the end of the money.

And you always feel guilty that you're not doing enough and that you should do more.

Your husband's no longer really involved. He mentally checked out long before he physically checked out. Two year's into your diagnosis he just simply gave up. He couldn't figure out how to engage your child.

He wasn't ready to give up his own dreams and couldn't bring himself to realize that his life wasn't going to be the same as he had planned originally. So he walked.

It's Valentines Day now.

You won't be getting flowers or chocolates. You won't even get a card, a note, or even a phone call. Valentine's Day will be just another day.

For eight years you've yearned to hear your child say "I love you." For eight years you've ached to have him say anything at all. It won't happen again this year.

All your friend will post pictures on Facebook of their Valentine's Day gifts and the special cards and notes their children made for them. You will say to yourself "I don't really care," but something inside of you will die all over again.

Some statistics show that over 80% of our special needs children are now being raised by single female caregivers. Even for the married moms, sometimes you feel like you are doing this alone.

Thursday is Valentine's Day, and that can invoke a lot of emotions for them...maybe for you.

So I want to use my blog space today to speak directly to the moms of our special needs children, wherever you are.  For all of you who may not hear from anyone else on this day, or receive any any gift or recognition at all- I want to make sure someone tells you how much you mean to them.

That distant clapping you hear is coming from heaven. That's where they are joining with me in giving you a standing ovation.

Mom you are a hero.

Mom you are a world changer.

That whole greater love has no one than to lay down their live for another Bible verse?

That's you too mom.

That child with special needs. You're not just their valentine...you are their everything.

When I think of all you moms do, I get choked up and then I tear up.

If no one else "gets it," I want you to know I "get it."

After all, I'm married to one of you.

I admire you, I respect you, and I just want to affirm you. There is a reason God called you and chose you to be a special needs mom.

And if you don't get anything else on Valentine's Day from anyone else,  I hope you will consider this my valentine just for you.

--Jeff Davidson