Impact Story: The Howes Family
We would like to introduce you to the Howes family! This family has become very special to Rising Above Ministries over the last few years, and we know you will enjoy hearing their story.
Tell us a little bit about the members of the Howes family and what you all enjoy doing together…
I’m Rosie, and my husband Joseph and I have been married for almost 10 years. We have an 8-year-old son named Hyrum and a 4-year-old daughter named Daisy. Hyrum loves nothing more than to be soaking in the sunshine on his swing or floating in the pool on a hot day. He also thinks Whoopi cushions are the most hilarious things ever and is a social butterfly who loves having people take his hand and talk to him. Daisy loves to play dress up and she also loves singing and doing her ballet. As a family we enjoy doing fun nights in. We do movie nights, campfires in the backyard with s’mores and hot chocolate, and lots of board games.
Which member of your family has special needs?
Hyrum suffered a stroke in utero which caused severe brain damage and a condition called Hydrocephalus where the cerebral spinal fluid backed up and caused pressure on his brain. This condition had a ripple effect which led to a dozen other diagnoses, including epilepsy and cerebral palsy.
What was your response to your child’s diagnosis? Your spouse’s response? How did it affect your other children?
I was terrified. I was never really a “kid person,” so I felt unprepared and wasn’t sure what to do with a healthy child, much less one with profound special needs. No words can describe the complete heartbreak and devastation that I felt. I took that hurt out on everyone around me and withdrew into a deep dark cave of depression and hopelessness. My husband just grew quiet. He didn’t talk about how he felt, he didn’t yell back at me, and he wouldn’t cry. He was just silent. We survived the best way we could individually. I don’t think I ever talked to him. I just took all my frustrations out on him by yelling. I was so hurt and angry, and I felt like God had betrayed me. How come we didn’t get a miraculous healing? Eventually we completely gave up on believing in God.
How did you first learn about Rising Above?
Several people had mentioned it to me over the course of a few months. My son’s vision teacher, his occupational therapist, a nurse at his pediatricians office... you know, the professionals that consume our daily lives. I looked Rising Above up on Facebook and it looked amazing, but I was not optimistic. We had tried different play date groups and churches before, and they would eventually lead to leaving in tears and feeling even more hurt and alone. I watched posts and events on Facebook for probably a good year before I worked up the nerve to go to an event.
Are there specific Rising Above events that your family enjoys?
Hyrum and Daisy always love the Easter Eggstravaganza event and the Fall Festival. Hyrum truly loves the wheelchair accessible hayride almost as much as I love watching him laugh going “off road” around the farm. I personally love my Coffee Talk moms and The By the Brook retreat. Last year, I was able to get a hotel and have a true weekend away, where I slept, ate, had my hair done, and got a massage, without having to wait on or take care of anyone else for a whole weekend. There are just no words for the rejuvenation that weekend brings me.
How has Rising Above impacted your life?
Rising Above Ministries have given us a sense of belonging and community, showing us unconditional love and inclusion. The constant anger and contention that filled our lives faded while Hope and Love took over. We accepted Christ into our lives, and I am continuing to grow and become the wife and mother God wants me to be. Everyone needs a village of people to help see them through the trials of this life, but I truly believe God saw our family and knew we needed more of an Army. Rising Above is our army that has been by our side during some the darkest hours of our lives.
Rising Above is the reason we can honestly say that we love this life together. Our family is beautiful and amazing. We love each other just the way God has created us, and we will be ok.
I am truly grateful for The people I have met through Rising Above that are there for us. When we are drowning, they are the ones who don’t stand there and say,” need help?” They just dive in and help. Whether it’s sending Grubhub to the hospital, a friend to listen, or someone sending just a funny meme or gif that makes me laugh and remember I’m seen and not alone.
We are grateful for so many donors and volunteers who make stories like this a reality every day. Your partnership makes it possible for us to continue to pursue our mission of bringing the love of God and hope in Christ to special-needs families in the Upper Cumberland, across the nation, and around the world.